“Is freedom anything else than the right to live as we wish?”
Searching for answers
Shadia contacted me after visiting a Medium for a psychic reading. During that session, she had been told that she had once lived a life in Ancient Egypt, and that this earlier incarnation was directly related to some of her current day issues. Tantalised by such an idea, but no closer to discovering the ‘truth’, Shadia asked for my help. Could I provide further details? Slowly and peacefully I sank into a deep trance, pictures and words floating into my mind.
Riddles and puns
From on high, the Spirit World joyfully casts us little hints about places, dates and events, but rarely in my experience are they specific. Even so, much can be gained from careful scrutiny of words and images provided through clairaudience and clairvoyance. Puns and riddles are everywhere, and I believe they are purposefully positioned, so to encourage the use of intuition.
48-44 BC
Useful historical references and place-names are scattered throughout the text. Hypnos, the Ancient Greek god of sleep, is referred to, as is Caesar - but which Caesar? Israel, Zion and the Promised Land are all mentioned. This is all very teasing, and yet so normal for Spirit communication! The placing of words is never random within a psychic message. Everything has a purpose, and in this case I believe that these words are clues to the date.
So, what do they tell us? We can make a few assumptions. This past life took place at a time when the Caesars were closely associated with Egypt. It was also a moment in history when Greek culture predominated (there are no references to Ancient Egyptian deities). So, I think we’re looking at the later Ptolemaic Dynasties rather than the earlier Pharaonic ones for a date. The Hellenistic Empire colonised Ancient Egypt in 305 BC. It lasted until Roman rule in 30 BC.
My best guess is that this past life took place when Julius Caesar was living in Egypt with the Greek Queen Cleopatra, c.48-44 BC. That timing would explain the references to a Greek god but also to Caesar within the context of Egypt.
Alexandria
For location, I am drawn to the northern seafaring coast of Egypt. Alexandria was one of the most powerful and strategic trading centres on the Mediterranean c.48-44 BC, and I think it is here (or somewhere close) where events enfolded.
Young love
‘Harlequin’
The first few words always set the focus for the session. They tell us what is being healed. In this case, the word ‘harlequin’ hints enigmatically at the fundamental trauma of this Egyptian life. It is the catalyst for distress so deep that karma has remained unresolved for over two thousand years.
Harlequin is one of the characters from the ‘Harlequinade’. This theatre play is about Harlequin, who loves Columbine. However, Columbine’s greedy and deceitful father, Pantaloon, tries to separate the lovers. He pays other characters in the play to help him to achieve his end. Harlequin is a servant, and Columbine is a merchant’s daughter.
Arranged marriage
What this tells us about the Egyptian life is that it is a tragedy about young love. In that incarnation, Shadia was an innocent young girl, probably in her teens, who fell in love with a young man of inferior position, perhaps a servant. Her father, a merchant, didn’t approve. He had his eye on making a tactical and lucrative alliance with another wealthy family, offering his daughter as bride to their son. It was an arranged marriage, where greater power and social recognition for himself was undoubtedly part of the plan. This was a good match, financially and practically, for his own self serving interests.
The merchant became increasingly concerned about his daughter’s growing friendship with her young man. Even though it was just a youthful dalliance, he perceived it as a potential threat to his ambitions.
‘In the race’ ‘we’re together’ ‘every second’
The daughter knew of her father’s ambitions, but she was young and romantic with the natural optimism of youth. She thought it would all work out OK for her and her beau. They spent as much time together as they could. But it was a race against time. Her father was busy negotiating a dowry for the proposed marriage.
Immigrant family
‘Race’ is an interesting word to use, and has a double meaning here. It tells us that there were conflicting ideas between the major players in this incarnation due to cultural differences. The girl’s family were from Greece. They had settled in a coastal trading centre in Egypt where they ran a profitable business. She had been brought up in Egypt. It was her home and her way of life. The parents, being much older when they arrived, had not adapted to the local ways as freely as she had. They still maintained their own Greek culture. This is where the difference lay between parents and daughter. When she fell in love with a local Egyptian boy, it wasn’t what they had planned for her, or wanted.
Culture clash
So how does that relate to Shadia’s life now? There is a striking resemblance. Born and bred in the UK, but from Asian descent, Shadia also found herself caught up in opposing cultural views about marriage. Respectful of her parent’s belief in arranged marriages, and yet at heart a modern and independent young woman, she found herself in a tricky position. Although not easy, Shadia managed to remain firm. She would not agree to an arranged marriage, and it was not forced upon her (unlike the earlier incarnation).
Ancient Karma
‘Hospital’ ‘hurry up’ ‘going to be OK’
Karma which has been around for two thousand years will be significant. Minor karma would be long gone by now, completely worked through and resolved. So we can assume that the damage done to the soul in this past life is quite profound. This is why the word ‘hospital’ is used. It means that specialist healing is required in order for the karma to be transmuted. That can be done. But perhaps not at the speed (hurry up!) that Shadia would like. In other words, what Spirit is saying here is that it will take a little time. But it is perfectly possible to resolve it (going to be OK).
Entrenched beliefs
The text turns to Shadia’s modern day life. It deals with the stress she has been under from parental pressure to marry according to Asian tradition. Her parents favour an arranged marriage.
‘Pardon me’ ‘Bliss’ ‘back to you’ ‘grounded’ ‘Heaven’
Shadia is apologising (pardon me) for putting her own happiness (bliss) first. Turning her back on ‘sensible’ (grounded) choices of suitors as promoted by her family. But these are far from true love matches (heaven). These are possible thoughts in her head, but more likely belief systems getting in the way of her living the life she wants to live.
‘I can do anything’ ‘I know I can’
On one level she knows that she is free to do whatever she likes. After all, we live in a free society! And yet somehow she feels that she is fighting against the inevitable. That she will succumb to family pressure. This will be the influence of belief systems originating in her past life.
Ancient Greece
‘Hypnos’
Hypnos is the Ancient Greek god of sleep. This useful reference dates Egypt to the later period (Ptolemaic dynasty) when it was part of the Hellenistic kingdom. Through implication we are in a Greek setting rather than an Egyptian one.
In her desperation the girl turned to the gods, hoping for divine intervention before the marriage preparations were irretrievably concluded. She chose Hypnos. Hoping for a miracle, she prayed that he would help her parents to understand her perspective. Who better than a god of sleep to intervene in their awakening? Surely a god from their own land, speaking their own language would have the best chance of getting through, she thought.
A loveless marriage
‘Real together’ ‘maximum’ ‘overseas’
To get the most out of a relationship there has to be a real emotional bond between partners. This is precisely what didn’t happen in this past life, where the marriage was shallow, a travesty of what it should have been. She was in one world, and both her parents and future husband were in another. Their cultural understandings were oceans apart.
‘Tell them I’m useless’ ‘What happened?’ ‘melting life’
Her self-esteem and confidence plummeted. She saw her life melting away before her eyes. All her hopes and dreams faded, and a stark reality set in. What had happened to the beautiful future she had dreamt of? It was gone.
Karmic path
‘Harlequin’ ‘Addenbrookes’ ‘parent brookes’
These words reflect Shadia’s situation today. As in the Ancient Egyptian life, she has felt the pressure to marry someone chosen by her parents, rather than the ideal (Harlequin) whom she craves.
Addenbrookes Hospital is a major trauma centre in Cambridge. The use of the word Addenbrookes implies how important it is for Shadia to marry on her terms, otherwise there could be another trauma coming. This is the soul lesson that Shadia is in the process of learning. Balance has yet to be achieved on this difficult subject of love and marriage. Unfinished business remains between Shadia and her parents, and this karmic pattern will repeat in future lifetimes until it is fully resolved. Some call this the karmic wheel.
Back in Egypt
‘Nothing to eat’ ‘leave her alone’
By now the dowry was agreed, but the daughter was still refusing to marry. Her parents tried to force her into submission by locking her up in a room with no food. The situation became uglier by the minute.
‘Paid for him’ ‘this way’ ‘police the door’
Angry at their daughter’s stubborn behaviour, they ruthlessly tried a practical approach. They got the prospective bridegroom to rape her. There was no way out (police the door), and no one to call upon for help. The rape affected her badly. The stress was too much.
‘Don’t let her out’ ‘leave the latch on’
She was left to think about it in her room. She began to understand (latch on) the terrible position she was now in. She felt violated and degraded.
‘Give us a hand’ ‘independent’ ‘this one’
Despite the rape, they didn’t find the task of changing her mind easy. If anything, it made her more determined to resist
‘Broke their plans’ ‘sort them out’ ‘Caesar’s belt’
The only way to keep their plans secure was to take control of the situation. They gave her a beating. That finally broke her spirit.
The reference here to Caesar gives us a sense of their cruelty. Just as Caesar might ruthlessly quell a rebellion, so would they totally crush their daughter’s resistance to their plans. They were determined to win at all costs.
Evolution of the soul
‘That was yesterday’ ‘a half truth’ ‘her name’
These words are taking a higher perspective on this trauma. Damaging old memories, stored deep within Shadia’s energy body, must be released if she is to be fully liberated. Only then will the karmic wheel stop. Her higher self (super conscious) must let go of all attachments to those past life events. A new pattern of thinking needs to be created. It is the only way for the soul to move on and evolve.
A Greek wedding
‘In the garden’ ‘of the law’ ‘he and you’ ‘it’s going to happen’ ‘I’m telling you’
We’re back in Egypt. A pretty marriage ceremony took place in the garden of her parents’ house. It looked idyllic, but within herself it was no source of pleasure. Her parents had laid down the law, and ultimately she had obeyed. There was no more to say on the matter.
‘We haven’t lived here’ ‘canoodling’ ‘promises’
After the marriage ceremony had taken place, her husband told her that they would be travelling to distant parts. He spoke of how wonderful it would be, making all sorts of promises. She didn’t know what this other country might be like, but she warmed to the idea of a sweet life. She agreed to go.
‘Israel’ ‘anti-hero’ ‘Zion maker’ ‘promised land’
He was lying. It was a vicious (Israel) experience, nothing like the Earthly paradise (Zion) that he had promised. She thought she was going to be living in a lovely town house in Jerusalem, and it would all be sweetness and light. But it wasn’t like that at all.
‘The whole region’ ‘‘change the rules’
They were constantly on the road, travelling long distances in the Land of Israel. It was yet another cultural shake up for her. She had to adapt to a new way of life, and follow another set of strict customs.
Exhaustion
‘Get another one’ ‘hurry up’
Her husband was keen (hurry up) to have a son and heir, but she kept on miscarrying. He didn’t understand her need to grieve and rest after each miscarriage. The continual cycle of pregnancy and miscarriage contributed to her increasing mental instability and physical exhaustion
Lies and dishonesty
‘I’m buying it’ ‘when I go out’
She thought she had some control over how her money was spent, but she did not. The dowry, which had been handed directly over to her husband on their marriage, had been incorporated into his business.
‘Come up the wrong crossroads’
She began to realise that decisions (crossroads) were being made without her consent, and that they were illegal or dishonest (wrong)
‘Set it up’ ‘bloody hell’ ‘you rascal’
There was nothing she could do. The way the legal documentation had been written meant that she was powerless to do anything other than scream and shout. Goods were being acquired illegally.
‘A collection’ ‘I never had it’ ‘sheep’ ‘through his glasses’ ‘undiscovered’ ‘honest’
The money collected for her dowry was now completely in her husband’s power. She never got any of it. Many people were easily led (sheep) by his outward appearance of honesty. They were seeing things as he portrayed them (through his glasses).
Breakdown
‘Building work’ ‘the carriage moves on’ ‘an awful lot of pain’
It was a time when she had to dig deep (building work) within herself for strength. Several times she found herself miscarrying (carriage) while on the road. In terrible pain she just had to keep going as best she could.
‘At the moment when’ ‘her own machine’ ‘ad lib with her’
Her own physiological functioning (machine) started to go haywire (ad lib) under the strain. She found herself in much physical and emotional pain.
‘Going to give up’
It was all too much for her. She just wanted to die. She also started to lose faith in God
‘Tie up’ ‘all re-covered’ ‘we took the view that’
Her escalating health problems were hidden (cover up) from the public at large. The family made out that she was absolutely fine. They wanted people to believe their version of the truth. But she wasn’t getting any better.
‘Smash it’ ‘lunatic’
She became irrational and destructive. It was a hormonal imbalance, but no one realised that. At a certain time of each month she would become angry, hostile and antagonistic. People started to think that she was going mad. Today we would probably call this PMT.
‘Whoever’s in it’
She was becoming unrecognisable, nothing like the girl she used to be. As the years passed, her character changed. She found herself unable to express love, even to her children. She was irretrievably lost.
Greek culture
At this point, the vision of a woman wearing a bridal veil appears. It is a black frilled veil, completely covering her face. Suddenly the veil lifts back over her head to reveal her face and a few inches of matted fair hair above the forehead.
This is the young lady’s wedding veil. Veils were an important part of the Greek wedding tradition. It tells us that she married according to Greek marriage customs.
Shift in consciousness
Lifting the veil is symbolic of a shift of consciousness. It has taken place within Shadia. Negativity (black) about marriage customs, created by this past life trauma, has been lifted (veil lifts). She can now see the situation for what it is, rather than being negatively (black) affected by ancient prejudices. A sunnier attitude (fair hair) is taking its place. The matted hair tells us that there are still some sticking points needing resolution, but nevertheless it is a big improvement. The black frills symbolise austere thoughts on the matter.
Catalyst for karma
The fundamental trauma of this past life is the moment when the daughter was forced to marry against her inclination. She was obeying the will of her parents, and the culture within which they were brought up. It was not her choice, neither was it her culture. In every sense she felt Egyptian, while her parents remained very much Greek.
‘Crumpet’ ‘ripped off’
In that lifetime, her perception of womanliness was damaged. She felt nothing better than an object of her husband’s sexual desire (crumpet), a mechanism useful only to create babies. At death she took those negative thought forms with her, and they became grafted onto the soul. One of Shadia’s challenges in this lifetime will be to accept cultural differences, while remaining true to herself.